“The “Til You Do Right By Me” curse is the most devastating spell that can be cast by Black Americans. Dan Gilbert infamously tried to evoke this against LeBron James after he left Cleveland, but the spirit of Harriet Tubman blocked its effectiveness.”
“All the naysayers who were against marijuana legalization are eating crow right about now. Colorado’s weed sales just keep trending up, and with the sales of legal weed, they are improving their schools and reducing overall crime rates.”
WHAT YOU SHOULD DO:
- Stay with us and keep calm.
The last thing we need when we’re panicking, is to have someone else panicking with us.
- Offer medicine if we usually take it during an attack.
You might have to ask whether or not we take medicine- heck, some might not; but please, ask. It really helps.
- Move us to a quiet place.
We need time to think, to breathe. Being surrounded by people isn’t going to help.
- Don’t make assumptions about what we need. Ask.
We’ll tell you what we need. Sometimes; you may have to ask- but never assume.
- Speak to us in short, simple sentences.
- Be predictable. Avoid surprises.
- Help slow our breathing by breathing us or by counting slowly to 10.
As odd as it sounds, it works.WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T DO:
1. Say, “You have nothing to be panicked about.”
We know. We know. We know. And because we know we have nothing to be panicked about, we panic even more. When I realize that my anxiety is unfounded, I panic even more because then I feel like I’m not in touch with reality. It’s unsettling. Scary.
Most of the time, a panic attack is irrational. Sometimes they stem from circumstances — a certain couch triggers a bad memory or being on an airplane makes you claustrophobic or a break up causes you to flip your lid — but mostly, the reasons I’m panicking are complex, hard to articulate or simply, unknown. I could tell myself all day that I have no reason to be having a panic attack and I would still be panicking. Sometimes, because I’m a perfectionist, I become even more overwhelmed when I think my behaviour is “unacceptable” (as I often believe it is when I’m panicking). I know it’s all in my mind, but my mind can be a pretty dark and scary place when it gets going.
Alternate suggestion: Say, “I understand you’re upset. It is okay. You have a right to be upset and I am here to help.”
2. Say, “Calm down.”
This reminds me of a MadTV sketch where Bob Newhart plays a therapist who tells his patients to simply “Stop it!” whenever they express anxiety or fear. As a sketch, it’s funny. In real life, it’s one of the worst things you can do to someone having a panic attack. When someone tells me to “stop panicking” or to “calm down,” I just think, “Oh, okay. I haven’t tried that one. Hold on, let me get out a pen and paper and jot that down, you jerk.”
Instead of taking action so that they do relax, simply telling a panicking person to “calm down” or “stop it” does nothing. No-thing.
Alternate suggestion: The best thing to do is to listen and support. In order to calm them down without the generalities, counting helps.
3. Say, “I’m just going to leave you alone for a minute.”
Being left alone while panicking makes my heart race even harder. The last thing I want is to be left by myself with my troubled brain. Many of my panic attacks spark from over-thinking and it’s helpful to have another person with me, not only for medical reasons (in case I pass out or need water) but also it’s helpful to have another person around to force me to think about something other than the noise in my head.
Alternate suggestion: It sometimes helps me if the person I’m with distracts me by telling me a story or sings to me. I need to get out of my own head and think about something other than my own panic.
4. Say, “You’re overreacting.”
Here’s the thing: I’m not. Panic attacks might be in my head, but I’m in actual physical pain. If you’d cut open your leg, no one would be telling you you’re overreacting. It’s a common trope in mental health to diminish the feelings or experience of someone suffering from anxiety or panic because there’s no visible physical ailment and because there’s no discernible reason for the person to be having such a strong fear reaction.
The worst thing you can tell someone who is panicking is that they are overreacting.
Alternate suggestion: Treat a panic attack like any other medical emergency. Listen to what the person is telling you. Get them water if they need it. It helps me if someone rubs my back a little. If you’re in over your head, don’t hesitate to call 911 (or whatever the emergency services number is where you are). But please, take the person seriously. Mental health deserves the same respect as physical health.
for more inspiration: http://sunshinewhenitsraining.tumblr.com/
Throwback - Celebrities Recreate Iconic Covers for Ebony Magazine’s 65th Anniversary (2010)
To celebrate its 65th anniversary issue and icons of the past and present, EBONY magazine asked their favorite entertainers to pose in modern-day recreations of those covers for a one-of-a-kind look back at the past.
Featuring: Regina King (as Eartha Kitt), Mary J. Blige (as Diana Ross), Nia Long (as Dorothy Dandridge), John Legend (as Duke Ellington), Lamman Rucker (as Richard Roundtree), Taraji P. Henson (as Diahann Carroll), Blair Underwood (as Sidney Poitier), Jurnee Smollett (as Lena Horne), Usher Raymond (as Sammy Davis, Jr.), and Samuel L. Jackson (as Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.), among others.
Seems like IKEA are really shaking things up this year. In addition to the previously announced TV set, they’re also going to release a digital camera made of cardboard called Knäppa (“Snap”). It’ll hold 40 photographs at a time and plugs directly into your USB port. While it’s not the prettiest camera the world has ever seen, I do love the idea of a screen-less digital camera that brings people back to the wait-and-see days of film.
Hoping to get this boosted, because maybe it can save someone from hard times and get them a job at whatever establishment this racist ass manager is at.
(this was on NYT FB article posting about a (Black) mother Google searching her unborn child’s name to see what connotations and future it could hold for him)
And then you have people justifying this action. But a meritocracy exists right?
But I don’t even know how to pronounce his last name…..
Someone find out where he works so we can can e-mail his Boss and get him fired cause almost every company has a non discrimination policy